Par on Tuart

After last week's golf-free Saturday we SOS'lers were keen on getting back onto the course. We were welcomed by a strikingly blue sky and frisky temperatures in the low 20ties. Morning greetings were exchanged while assembling the equipment. 

Ian & Dave chatting away while
Derek & Frances are getting their equipment ready. 

Today PAR was on the menu and to our dismay, we were greeted by sanded greens. While this technique is necessary for the health of the greens it causes headaches and frustration to even the best putter.

Captain and treasurer seemingly discussing
serious club matters
Shelley, this glove looks brandnew.

Steph, Frances & Birgit "social distancing" with
Ian photobombing in the background

 "Besties" Dave and Ian enjoying their 
pre-match flat white

Frances, Gerry, Derek & Shelley 

Derek, Gerry, Barry & Greg

The players probably discussing their strategy for the day or how to record the PAR results on their scorecards. "Mate, are you drawing a square or a circle on your scorecard"? 

The captain is setting an example by bringing his "keep-cup", rumours are that his wife is keen on protecting the environment.

Keith, Earle & Shelley 
with Malcolm in the driver's seat

The first group eager to tee off, driver Malcolm wearing this protective mask. 

Well done keeping us safe!

Glenn, Carol, Dave

Group 2: good luck Carol, keep that mask on. 😁

Colin, Ian, Greg & Frances

3rd group: Ian yet photobombing yet again.....Barry? Where is Boris?

Derek, Goochie, Birgit & Steph ready for combat

4th group: Another good example of social distancing or Derek are you tiptoeing away?

THE GAME

No dramas were reported, no drained equipment, no killed wildlife it just seemed that 2 members were not happy playing on the fairway, but needed a bit of a holiday feeling.

Derek on a bushwalk

Colin on the beach

RESULTS

Rank	Name	Hcp	Score	Birdies
1	Lynne Malone	16	+5
2	Glen Pope	8	+3	3
3	Colin Kerr	14	0 C/B
4	Greg Bennett	21	0
5	Ian Holmes	16	-1 C/B
6	Glen Kelly	13	-1
7	Keith Barrow	10	-2
8	Maureen Sundari	10	-3 C/B	6 & 15
9	David Williamson	25	-3
10	Gary Burgess	8	-3
11	Frances Longhurst	19	-4 C/B
12	Carol Barrow	30	-4 C/B
13	Shelley Yeo	14	-4 C/B
14	Barry Treak	20	-4 C/B
15	Birgit Reinartz	35	-4
16	Lynley Hunter	11	-5 C/B
17	Stephanie Jeffares	15	-5
18	Gerry Tessier	17	-6 C/B
19	Mark Hill	11	-6
20	Earle Scarff	15	-7	4 & 2
21	Derek Longhurst	20	-8 C/B
22	Tony Gooch	5	-8	15

Novelty	Hole	Contender	Winner
NTP in 3	7		Mark
NTP in 3	15	Earle, Keith, Colin	Tony Gooch
NTP	18	Keith, Tony	Ian
LD women	2		Shelley
LD all	8	Earle, Barry, Frances	Maureen

Winner Lynne and runner-up Glen
Colin No. 3 on the podium was absent

Goochie is todays 
 "most honest player" and
winning "The Lollies!

GOLDEN HOLE

YESSS!!! Glen hit the jackpot and won $ 62. Congratz Glen, well done and don't spend it right away.

FINES

Goochie did a good job collecting fines, I'm worried though that no one came forward with a "Garcia" (it's a 4 putt isnt' it?). At least one or two of us should have managed to 4 putt in todays condition.

I heard that "assault on wildlife" was rephrased to "assault on wife", but I doubt that this will pass the commitee.

A request to introduce a new fine "Doing a Barry" (missing a 10 cm putt) is more likely to be implemented.

Players who didn't fill in the score card correctly (e.g. marker name missing) were fined on the spot by the captain. 

RAFFLE

Glenn, the raffle apprentice
in conference with Keith

Keith won the first raffle price and 
is keen to handing it over to Carol.

MISCELLANEOUS

** Any suggestions for novelties can be send to Earle, to improve your chances that the mail is being read you should copy Vickie. 😀

** We welcomed Mark Hill as a new SOS member. Welcome Mark!!

** Frances Longhurst has been re-baptised as "France" also known as the capital of red wine, baguette and cheese. 😀

Info from the captain and booking officer

Last weeks cancelled game with the blind golfers association will take place Saturday, the 8th followed by a BBQ at Lake Perry. Hurry to secure your space, at the time of the after game gathering there were only 18 spots available.

Last but not least

A nun walks into the Mother Superior’s office and plunks down into a chair. She lets out a sigh, heavy with frustration.

“What troubles you, Sister?” asked the Mother Superior. “I thought this was the day you spent with your family.”

“It was,” sighed the Sister. “And I went to play golf with my brother. We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ.”

“I seem to recall that,” the Mother Superior agreed. “So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?”

“Far from it,” snorted the Sister. “In fact, I took the Lord’s name in vain today!”

“Goodness, Sister!” gasped the Mother Superior, astonished. “You must tell me all about it!” 

“Well, we were on the fifth tee — and this hole is a monster, Mother — 540 yard par 5, with a nasty dogleg right and a hidden green … and I hit the drive of my life. The sweetest swing I’ve ever made. And it’s flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted … and it hits a bird in mid-flight!” 

“Oh my!” commiserated the Mother Superior. “How unfortunate! But surely that didn’t make you blaspheme, Sister!” 

“No, that wasn’t it,” admitted the Sister. “While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!” 

“Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!” sympathized the Mother Superior. 

“But I didn’t, Mother!” sobbed the Sister. “And I was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether this was a sign from God, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!” 

“So that’s when you cursed,” said the Mother Superior with a knowing smile. 

“Nope, that wasn’t it either,” cried the Sister, anguished, “because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!” 

The Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed the Sister with piercing stare and said … 

“You missed the f#$%ing putt, didn’t you?”