CLUB CHAMPIONSHIP, ROUND ONE - OLD COURSE

Dear Diary

Twenty eight days now since the last round of SOS, and the sun still comes up every morning. How does that happen?

Beautiful golfing weather, the fairways are mown and the greens are just waiting.

While in the shed, the clubs slowly rust in frustration.

Social isolation has got knobs. I wouldn't care which group Glen put me into. I'd even play with you know who.

Just this once.

Here's something you can try while you're playing with yourself (whoops!)

Meanwhile we gather the Malaysian prime minister has asked wives to refrain from nagging their husbands during this difficult period.

Perhaps we need Scottie to show similar leadership.

So, how did you go in the first round of the club championship on the old course? A birdie on the fifth? Did you nudge the Golden Hole on the sixteenth? A par on the last?

That well-earned beer in the bar while you waited for the final group to come in?

And cap it all off with a ball in the raffle?

Ah, what could have been. I'm imaging that first drive, just to the right of the big tree, with enough roll to get back on to the fairway, while my partner is deep in the trees to the right.

Get out the three wood. We're going for the top of the hill. Remind myself not to hit too hard. Lovely shot, stays in the middle. Meanwhile my partner's hit a tree, bounced back into trouble, and ended up just chipping out into the rough.

Third shot, I think about a bump and run onto the green, but feeling confident, a nice little pitch with the wedge, beautiful elevation, lands on the top tier, and trickles down to stop three inches from the hole. A tap in birdie, while my partner records an eight. Feeling better already.

Now to get inside the Nearest the Pin on the second....

But it's just fantasy. All we can do is be ready when the day comes.

Polish the clubs, darn the socks, clean out the golf bag and find that divot remover.

The day will come. Have no doubt. And we will be there.

Until then...

...who's been sneaking off for a quick nine holes at the Claremont par 3...

...or the "we never closed" Maylands...

Ex-SOS stalwarts spotted at Lake Claremont last week...

...or re purposed the front lawn as a buffalo-lawned green (adds a little randomised uncertainty to that final putt)?

Social distancing? No problem. No-one ever wants to play with me anyway.

Now we can acknowledge the foresight of those for whom "social distancing" has always been part of their approach to golf

Together with those rarely seen members who take the instruction to "stay home" to heart

But let's not "quarantine" those new shirts for too long.

So, let's not forget our friends - we're all still out there:

And don't worry, we'll all be back together again soon.

In the meantime:

In these difficult times, we all need a good laugh. Watch this and try not to smile...